Feel the fear and do it anyway

by Susan J. Jeffers

Publisher: Ballantine Books Published: 1988 Category: Psychology & Self-Help

Fear stands as one of the most universal human experiences, yet it remains one of the least understood forces shaping our daily choices and long-term life trajectory. Whether it manifests as anxiety about changing careers, reluctance to end unhealthy relationships, hesitation to speak our truth, or paralysis in the face of new opportunities, fear keeps countless individuals trapped in lives far smaller than they're capable of living. This groundbreaking work revolutionizes our relationship with fear by offering a radical yet profoundly practical framework for moving forward despite our anxieties rather than waiting for them to disappear.

At the heart of this transformative approach lies a simple but powerful truth: fear is not the enemy we've been conditioned to believe it is. Rather than viewing fear as a stop sign or evidence that something is wrong, readers discover how to recognize it as a natural companion to growth and expansion. The central premise challenges conventional wisdom by asserting that feeling afraid doesn't mean we're inadequate or unprepared. Instead, fear signals that we're stretching beyond our comfort zones into territories where genuine growth occurs. This reframing alone liberates countless individuals who have spent years waiting to feel confident before taking action, only to realize that confidence follows action rather than preceding it.

The methodology presented here introduces readers to five fundamental truths about fear that shift everything. These truths dismantle common misconceptions and replace them with empowering perspectives that make forward movement possible even when anxiety persists. Understanding that fear will never completely go away as long as we continue growing provides immense relief to those who've been waiting for perfect courage. Recognizing that everyone experiences fear when facing unfamiliar territory normalizes an experience that often feels isolating and shameful.

Beyond theoretical understanding, this work delivers concrete tools and techniques for building what might be called "fear tolerance." Readers learn specific mental exercises for shifting from a position of pain to a position of power, transforming victim consciousness into creator consciousness. The concept of expanding comfort zones through consistent action despite discomfort provides a roadmap for sustainable personal development. Rather than advocating reckless behavior, the approach emphasizes taking responsibility for our experience regardless of outcomes, which paradoxically reduces the stakes of any single decision.

The exploration extends into how fear manifests differently across various life domains: relationships, career, aging, decision-making, and self-expression. Each area receives dedicated attention, helping readers identify their particular fear patterns and the specific thought processes that keep them stuck. The work addresses both action fears related to doing or changing things and non-action fears related to letting things happen or giving up control. This comprehensive view ensures readers can apply these principles whether they're struggling with taking bold action or with surrendering and trusting life's process.

Particularly valuable are the sections addressing indecision and the paralyzing anxiety that accompanies major life choices. Rather than presenting decision-making as about finding the single "right" answer, readers discover a liberating model where no wrong decisions exist, only different paths offering different lessons and opportunities. This perspective dramatically reduces the pressure that makes decision-making agonizing and helps individuals commit fully to their choices rather than remaining perpetually second-guessing.

The work also tackles the subtle ways society conditions us, particularly women, to remain small and dependent. By examining cultural programming around gender, power, and self-worth, readers gain insight into external forces that have amplified their internal fears. This social consciousness dimension adds depth to what might otherwise remain purely individualistic psychology.

Throughout, the emphasis remains practical rather than purely inspirational. Specific exercises, affirmations, and behavioral strategies ensure readers leave with actionable steps rather than just good intentions. The underlying message offers hope without false promises: life becomes not fearless but fear-full in the sense of being rich, expansive, and authentic despite ongoing anxiety. This honest, compassionate approach has helped millions move from paralysis to purposeful action, from resignation to engagement, from playing small to claiming their full potential.